Feline Physics Laws

Law of Cat Inertia A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force – such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse. Law of Cat Motion A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change […]

Giving Cats Pills

INSTRUCTIONS FOR GIVING YOUR CAT A PILL 1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill […]

Bear Efficiency

Bear Efficiency…Some just know how to get things done! These pictures are said to have been taken by a guy from Grande Cache, Alberta,1.5 hours south of Grande Prairie, by the Berland River on Highway 40.Take a look at the time frame in the bottom right-hand corner of each photo … It took just ten […]

Comparing trunks…

The Feline Diet

Most diets fail because we are still thinking and eating like people. For those us who have never had any success dieting. Well now there is the new Miracle Cat Diet! This diet will also work on humans! Except for cats that eat like people — such as getting lots of table scraps — most […]

Removing a Gorilla

A man walked into his back yard one morning and found a gorilla in a tree. He called a gorilla-removal service, and soon a serviceman arrived with a stick, a Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs, and a shotgun. “Now listen carefully,” he told the homeowner. “I’m going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla […]

Elephant jokes 14

Why shouldn’t you take an elephant to the zoo? Because he’d rather go to the movies! What’s blue and has big ears? An elephant at the North Pole! What’s grey and lights up? An electric elephant! What’s big and grey and protects you from the rain? An umbrellaphant! What do you do with a green […]

Buy alligator shoes

A man was on holiday in the depths of Louisiana, where he tried to buy some Alligator shoes. However he was not prepared to pay the high prices, and after having failed to haggle the vendor down to a reasonable price level, ended up shouting “I don’t give two hoots for your shoes man, I’ll […]

Two roaches having a discussion

Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant. “I was in that new restaurant across the street,” said one. “It’s so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere–it’s so sanitary that the whole place shines.” pr0p3rty0fahaj0kes […]

Cow on train tracks

A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. “What’s going on?” she yells out the window. “Cow on the track!” replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees […]