The new rhea farmer

A computer programmer, bored with his job, decided to start his own business. Wanting to do something totally different from his current occupation, he bought a mating pair of rheas and a large tract of land. His rhea farm was soon doing a booming business as there appeared to be a great demand for the […]

Jewish anthropologist

A Jewish anthropologist, Benny Steinfeld, was working in the desert near Israel when he happened upon an odd looking vase. After cleaning it he pried open the lid and was astonished when a genie sprang from the container and granted him 3 wishes. Steinfeld wished for enormous wealth, huge land holdings and a bevy of […]

Hard working Penny

Penny was a hard working, conscientious girl, who lived on her own. Her dream in life was to go on an ocean cruise around the world. So she scrimped, and she saved, and she saved, and she scrimped until finally, one day, she had enough money to go on her ocean cruise. She booked passage […]

The Fence

There’s this Wizard who worked in a factory. Everything was satisfactory except that miscreants, taking advantage of his good nature, would steal his parking spot. This continued until he put up the following sign: This parking space belongs to the Wizard. … Violators will be toad.”””,Wizard in the factory,,future,open,open,,wizard-in-the-factory,,,2013-06-02 22:12:43,2013-06-03 06:12:43,,0,http://www.classicforwards.com/wizard-in-the-factory/,0,post,,0 8833,1,2013-06-03 02:30:21,2013-06-03 10:30:21,”there was […]

A contest and a bird

Very early one morning two birds are sitting at the side of a large puddle of oil. They see a worm on the other side. So … the one flies over and the other one swims through-which one gets to the worm first? The one who swam, of course, because “Da oily boid gets da […]

Atoms and a Buddhist

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!” Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist’s Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication!

The dog and neutron

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.” A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, “How much for a beer?” The bartender replies, “For you, no charge.”

A grandson’s coffee

A Grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning when he had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life. When she got to the bottom there were three of those little green army men in the cup. She said, “Honey, what are the army […]

Frog goes for a loan

A frog went to get a loan at a bank. The loan officer’s name was Ms. Patty Stack. When the frog told Ms. Stack that he wanted a loan, she asked if he had colateral. He showed her something that, to her, looked like a marbel and said “this is what I have for colateral”. […]

Cloning the scientist

A scientist was successful in cloning himself. He was asked to speak at a national convention of cloning scientists. The meeting room was located on the 45th floor of a New York skyscraper. The scientist arrived with his clone and proceeded to the podium. The clone sat at the end of the head table. The […]